Week Five: Top Five

Over the past month I’ve been to one wedding, two funerals, four birthday parties, two traditional markets, six malls, one scout camp, one beach barbecue and more dinners at friends’ houses—and by friends, I mostly mean strangers who want to become friends with the bule—than I can count. I’ve tried bat (never again) and I’ve raced on the back of an off-duty policeman’s motorcycle at midnight. I’ve listened to hundreds of students say their names, ages and hobbies and I’ve taught at least half of them that “fifteen” isn’t pronounced like “five-teen.” It’s been a busy month. Since this is my fifth week in Amurang and I’m still playing catch-up in this blog, I’ve decided to bring you up to date with a few Top Five lists.    

Top Five I’m-So-Not-In-Kansas-Anymore Experiences

5. I’ve eaten at Kentucky Fried Chicken twice, which is twice as many times in five weeks as the number of times I went there in my four years in Kentucky. Indonesians take me there to give me a taste of home, and I don’t object. But KFC in Indonesia isn’t much like home: before they eat, everyone washes their hands in a long, metal trough by the back door; every entrée comes with a moist mound of rice wrapped in tissue paper; the soft drinks come in one size, which is about as big as a Dixie cup; ads with cute teenage girls in jilbabs eating fried chicken play continually on TV screens.

4. If I’m not walking to school, I’m taking an ojek (taxi-motorcycle) or bendi (taxi-buggy). Both take you anywhere in town for the equivalent of 20 American cents. The teachers prefer I take a bendi because it’s slow, safe and traditional; I prefer the ojek because it makes me feel badass to zoom to school sidesaddle in my ladylike teacher’s skirts.

One of Amurang's many bendis.

3. The whole school took a field trip to the North Sulawesi State Fair. While I was half-walking, half-being pushed through the crowd, a man on stage started yelling into his mic, “Amerika, Amerika!” He was the MC of an English speech competition for students that had just begun; within two minutes, the headmaster of my school had decided I should serve as a judge and had pulled me onto a balcony above the stage. For an hour, I listened to adorable kids give nearly incomprehensible speeches with titles like “Go Green, Sulawesi!” and “Just Say No to Drugs and Free Sex!” When I announced the winner at the end of the competition, the crowd stared at me blankly. It turned out no one knew the word “winner” in English.

2. Ely, my teaching counterpart, told me September 24 was National Sports Day. He said, “We will all go jogging together in the morning to celebrate.”
I said, “Cool. So it’ll be like the students and the PE teachers?”
He said, “No, no; all the teachers and all the students from every school in Amurang will jog with all the town’s government officials and policemen.”
I said, “Um. Cool.”
And he was half-right: thousands of students and hundreds of adults met at 5:30 am outside the regency headquarters and a stretch of road was shut down for us, but no one jogged. We walked.

Students, teachers and bureaucrats marching along a coastal road.

1. I have a newfound hatred for the inventor of the camera phone: my photo is taken constantly, by everyone around me. The teachers take my photo while I check my email; the students take my photo while I eat lunch. Those two funerals I attended? People took my photo while the preacher spoke. People who have never met me thrust their squirming children into my arms and take my photo. To keep my sense of humor (and sanity) about the whole thing, I’ve made some rules: you have to introduce yourself before you can take my photo, no photos in class, if I want to stick out my tongue or cross my eyes in the photo, you have to let me.

This is what it's like to stand in a crowd of camera-happy Indonesians.

Top Five Reasons I Like Teaching at an Indonesian High School

5. If I forget my laminated map of the US, I have to draw a map on the whiteboard to show Boston and Kentucky—and the students usually don’t know how bad it is.

I tried and failed to learn my ETA friend Thomas' impressive map-drawing skills.

4. I get black marks on my face from the whiteboard eraser on a daily basis. It happened on my first day, in my first class. But Indonesian students don’t sit tactfully silent and let you go around looking like an idiot; if you have something on your face, they say so. Marker on my face is now a running joke in my classes.

3. There’s no AC in school and fans in only three classrooms, so everyone sweats a lot. This makes everyone chain-drink bottles of water. So the combination of North Sulawesian heat and North Sulawesian generosity means that bottles of water appear in my hand almost magically. Sometimes students or teachers just show up at my desk or in the classroom to give me a bottle.

2. In the middle of school one day, I played a spontaneous, five-minute game of basketball with four students while 800 others cheered me on. I made three baskets, the crowd went wild every time and I think I can confidently say that it was the peak of my athletic career.

1. I ask all of my oldest students, “What do you want to do after you graduate?” Their answers are inspiring—“I want to be a pilot and travel around the world” and “I want to be a career woman and make my parents proud” and “I want to be a public prosecutor.” Sometimes when they answer me, I say, “You know what’s important for becoming a pilot/career woman/president/international lawyer?” The whole class shouts, “LEARNING ENGLISH!” and then giggles like crazy. 

Top Five Things I Miss Most About America

5. Coffee.
4. Fall weather.
3. Food that isn’t eaten with rice.
2. Coffee.
1. Coffee.

Top Five Surprises

5. I got electrocuted by my stove. My left hand was numb for an hour.

4. A group of friends (most of whom I had met at least once before) showed up at my door at midnight on my birthday with cake, confetti and party hats. It was so thoughtful, it nearly made me cry.

My wonderful Indonesian friends and a newly 22-year old me.

3. I was given a puppy, who I named Louisa May. She was brought to my house as an early birthday present. Way, way too early in fact—the puppy was less than four weeks old and could barely open her eyes. After one night of her peeing in my bed and sleeping on my neck, I demanded that she be returned to her mother until she was eight weeks old. It was my first near-fight with an Indonesian: the teacher who had found the dog told me it was cultural—four-week old puppies are commonly adopted in Indonesia!—and I told her, carefully, that it was biological—four-week old puppies can die without the nutrition from their mother’s milk. Luckily, Ely, who raises dogs, weighed in and agreed that four weeks was too young. The puppy was returned.

2. I was given a second puppy, who I also named Louisa May. She was plopped into my arms when I arrived at school on my birthday (four days after I’d returned the first Louisa). She is, thank God, a healthy eight-weeks old and pees exclusively on newspaper or outside. Raising a puppy is proving to be more difficult than I had imagined; as one teacher put it when I complained about being tired, “Being a mommy is hard.” But it’s also fun: Today we went for a walk around the neighborhood with a gang of kids who scooped Louisa up whenever a motorcycle or unfriendly dog appeared. I would call “C’mon, babygirl” to the puppy when she lagged behind; the kids would laugh and laugh and shout “C’mon, babygirl!” The whole town is getting a kick out of watching the white girl walk down the street with her little white dog trailing after.

Louisa May celebrating my birthday/her adoption day in style.

After Louisa's first bath.

1. I really, really like it here (almost all the time).

Nine Thousand Words

My house (I live on the first floor).

The living room/kitchen area.

Amurang Bay at sunrise...

And at sunset.

The public high school where I teach.

Ely and I try to sing "Happy Birthday" at his wife's birthday party.

Some of the teachers and me in the ruang guru (teacher's lounge).

At a lunch for 30 teachers, 13 pots of rice were prepared. Seriously.

Getting to Know You

“Hello, Miss! Where are you from?”
Saya dari di Amerika.
“What are you doing here?”
Saya guru Bahasa Ingriss.
“Have you eaten yet?”

Almost every time I meet an Indonesian, these are the first three questions I’m asked. Asking someone if they’ve eaten yet in North Sulawesi is a little bit like cramming “Hello, how are you, you’re my friend, and I care about you” into four simple words. It’s the first question I’m asked when I arrive at school, and I’m usually asked again ten minutes later by someone else. Even if I’m not around, people check in on my food-status: Last Friday at 8:30 am, I got a text from an economics teacher at my school: “Hello polly, did u have breakfast?” Sudah makan and Kenyang—I’ve already eaten and I’m full—have become as much  staples of my Indonesian vocabulary as rice is a staple of an Indonesian’s diet.

I arrived in Amurang on September 17. That first weekend was a flurry of shopping, unpacking and figuring out how long I can leave unwashed dishes out before the ants invade (answer: I can’t). My house, a pink and blue cottage ten yards from the ocean, was a wonderful surprise: clean, pretty and with views of the sunset over the bay that would make National Geographic weep. (Photos to come as soon as I can get solid enough internet for uploading.) Several teachers from school helped me furnish it with the necessities, including a water cooler, a rice cooker and a little wooden mortar and pestle that I have no idea how I'm expected to use. My only complaint: while coffee trees are common, coffee makers are nearly unheard of here. So as a resident of Sulawesi--an island whose coffee beans are sold at Starbucks, for God's sake--I'm learning to resign myself to a year of instant coffee.
                 
I live alone, in a small neighborhood of brightly colored, empty bungalows. But there are always people around: My landlord Jantje, who’s got Steve Martin’s white hair and his goofy sense of humor too (or at least, what I assume is a goofy sense of humor, since we can’t really communicate but he’s always grinning); the man who whisks away my trash every morning and fixes my water when it mysteriously stops; the group of construction workers building an apartment above mine who always say Dari kemana—Where have you been?—when I arrive home; and, of course, Ely.

Ely—Amelius Elias, a 40-year old English teacher at my school—is my AMINEF-approved “counterpart” in Amurang. He’s a small man with a big, cackling laugh that accompanies pretty much everything he says. (Our favorite reason to laugh together is when one of us says “doggie bag.” It’s a phrase I taught him at our first dinner out. Originally, the fact that in North Sulawesi dog meat is often on the menu and therefore your doggie bag could contain actual dog, struck us both as hilarious, but now I laugh just because his high-pitched giggle is so enjoyable.) Ely is my Big-Picture Logistics Man: he introduces me to local bureaucrats and policemen, organizes my teaching schedule and generally ensures my health and well-being.

My first two weeks at school were officially Orientation and Observation, but what that meant was five hours a day of sitting in the teacher’s lounge and becoming friends with the other 30 teachers, who mainly speak something between almost no English and absolutely no English. They are the friendliest people I’ve ever met and are borderline pathologically generous. (The way they bring me food to take home reminds me of that book The Very Hungry Caterpillar: on Monday, I went home with a bag of fruit; on Tuesday, I went home with a box of cake and two pork buns; on Wednesday, I went home with a packet of peanuts, a sack of pastries and an entire dinner’s worth of fish.) Because they’re so eager to talk with me—and because they’re so patient—my Indonesian is improving a lot quicker than I expected.

With the teachers, cultural exchange happens on a minute-by-minute basis. I startle them by walking to school (But Miss Polly, it’s so hot!) and drinking black coffee (But Miss Polly, it’s so bitter!). They startle me by smoking in the teacher’s lounge and not knowing their students’ names. I make them laugh when I try out Indonesian tongue twisters (ular lari lurus); they make me burst out laughing when the electricity goes out and they just keep on chatting. I learn from them that openly wiping sweat from your face with a tissue every couple of minutes is not only acceptable, it’s expected. They learn from me that, confusingly, English speakers say “Bon appetit” even though it’s not actually English.

I finally began teaching this past Monday. I’m teaching the tenth and eleventh grade, which means that I have about 600 students (20 classes of 30 students each). The students are thrilled to meet an American; we have a lot of the same interests (High School Musical, Taylor Swift, the Netherlands’ soccer team) and they think listening to me speak Indonesian is about the funniest thing in the world. Although they know English grammar pretty well, getting them to speak in class—something that has not been asked of them in English class before—will be more challenging than I had imagined. This week we practiced “How old are you?”, “What are your hobbies?” and—my favorite teaching moment so far—the difference between “How are you?” and “What’s up?”

So much has happened over the past three weeks (teaser: for one hour, I was the Simon Cowell of North Sulawesi) and I plan to write more about it as soon as possible. Trying to find internet frustrates me daily, but I’m trying to have an Indonesian-style patient attitude about it. I do have a phone number and an address now, so if I go MIA for weeks again—which I don’t plan on doing—you can get in touch with me.

Phone: 082110362272

Address: Evangeline Furth
    d/a SMAN 1 Tombasian – Amurang
    Jl. Trans Sulawesi
    Kel. Bitung, Kec. Amurang
    Sulawesi Utara 95354

Piranha 3D

On Friday, I rode on the back of an ojek (taxi-motorcycle) for the first time--in a skirt and without a helmet. It was terrifying and fantastic, but it wasn't the craziest thing I did this week.

I also paid 50,000 rupiah to have a swarm of tiny fish nibble my feet.

It was a spa procedure called Dr. Fish and I'm told it's fairly common in Asia. The "pedicure" consists of fish eating all the dead skin off your feet, leaving you with baby bottom-soft soles. My friends Emily and Paige and I decided to take the plunge (pun intended) and try it.

Once we were sitting on the ledge above the tank of fish hungry for our flesh, all three of us had embarrassingly girlish freak-outs. But we stuck our legs in anyway. The sensation wasn't unpleasant; when I closed my eyes, it felt like a thousand gentle vibrations against my feet. Looking down at the little black, almost worm-like fish devouring my body, however, remained disturbing for the duration of the 30 minute pedi.

If I had done some research ahead of time, I would have learned that fish pedicures are banned in several states because of the health risks. I would have read a doctor's warning: "Risks include the possible spread of viral diseases, such as hepatitis and AIDS, as well as the fact that the water is not sterile and is full of bacteria." And I probably wouldn't have done it. But I did--and my callus (and infection)-free feet are grateful.

In other slightly freakish news, I spent one evening this week being an ex-convict aunt-of-the-groom at a Hick Wedding. It was an ETA named Talya's idea: put on a very un-PC, backwoods-themed wedding and reception, with all 44 of us participating as characters, from "homeless groom" right down to "awkwardly seductive ring-bearer." We threw ourselves into character with the same imagination and passion that will serve us so well in the classroom. There were exaggerated Southern accents, fake cigarettes, insults hurled from family member to meth-addicted family member and a brawl between the groom and the bride's ex-boyfriend.

Looking fierce in my prison-orange and prison-tats (thanks to Elena for the quality photo).

Leif, the belligerent ex, interrupts the ceremony.

And best of all, there was Justin Bieber performed by the ETAs' very own, brand new, chart-topping boy band.

Why does love always feel like a lavafield?

Forget eyeball paper-cuts. The real drama started this week--and by drama, I mean a second-degree sunburn and a day of feverish vomiting.
The score is Indonesia 2, Polly 0.

Last weekend, 28 of us rented a bus and drove two hours southeast of Bandung to a region called Garut. Our plan was to climb Mount Papandayan, an active volcano, and visit its hot springs. My conversation--or rather, my translator's conversation--with the hotel in Garut had made me a little nervous: "You're Americans? Oh, you don't want to stay at this hotel. Let me give you the number of a better one." But, looking for the ever-elusive Authentic Indonesian Experience, we opted for the cheapest option and it turned out to be the right choice. There were no bed bugs and even the hole-in-the-ground toilets were almost pleasant, because they were continuously flushed by natural hot springs.






Eric and Brandon demonstrate two different methods for using the infamous Indonesian Toilet.

Needless to say, it's a lot harder on girls than boys.








On Sunday morning, we set out at 8:00 am for the volcano with our somewhat shifty guide, Bobby. The hike began on a steep road lined with houses that people popped out of at every minute to yell "Halo!" or "Bule!" (white person). When we realized that it would take at least two hours just to reach the the mountain, we climbed into the back of a pickup truck and rode the rest of the way to the base. The volcano was breathtaking; figuratively (it was gorgeous) and literally (walking through the sulfurous smoke made us cough and choke so much that we made makeshift gas-masks out of our clothes).

The volcanic part of the hike begins.

Me suffocating next to one of the vents.

The last time Mount Papandayan exploded was in 2002--it flattened an entire parking lot (but no one died).

We hummed the Lord of the Rings soundtrack as we hiked because it looked so Mordor-esque.

What's a hike without a swim? We swam in this freezing lake at the top of the volcano; the water tasted sour and dry, like vinegar.

The volcano-side weekend was wonderful, and I brought back only one, unforgettable souvenir: a deep red sunburn that erupted into blisters across my shoulders--the kind of burn that gives you chills. Since then, it's evolved into something halfway between leprosy and molting snakeskin. (Don't worry--no photos will be shown.) My first lesson in living in an equatorial climate: sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen.

My other lessons have been in the classroom: a group of Indonesian Ibus (older women) teach us Bahasa Indonesia and pedagogy. Our days are divided into halves: three hours learning Indonesian and three hours learning how to teach English. The Indonesian classes are fun, light-hearted and interesting; we've learned a lullaby and how Indonesians dance (feet planted together, elbows at your sides, two thumbs up) and lots of basic how-to-introduce-yourself-and-ask-for-a-cup-of-coffee type phrases. The language's simplicity makes it charming. For instance, there is only one verb tense; words like "already," "right now" and "not yet" clarify whether something is past, present or future. Three of my favorite things we've learned:

1. The word for charcoal is abu. The word for gray is abu-abu.
2. The world bebek means both duck (the animal) and bleat (the sound a goat makes).
3. The way to say "I am single" (Saya belum menikah) does not translate literally to "I am not married"--it translates to "I am not yet married."

Alison, Jolie and Eric perform a skit while Ibu Vita observes.

Ibus Lily, Grace, Fifine and Vita lead us in an Indonesian pop song.

Classes on how to teach have been a little less interesting; there's been a lot of brainstorming and writing lists on poster paper and listening to everyone give their opinions on anything (including, but not limited to, whether it's of utmost importance that English teachers should raise their inflection at the end of their sentences or lower it). Things picked up speed today when we "solo-taught" for the first time: Each ETA planned a 10-minute lesson focused on communicative English--and all the lessons I observed were outstanding. Taking the lead in the classroom for the first time made me remember why teaching feels somehow both exhilarating and totally natural.

"Natural" is also probably a good word to describe my first bout of welcome-to-Indonesia sickness--it was bound to happen sooner or later. Earlier during orientation, two Indonesian doctors led medical question-and-answer sessions, and they made it clear that digestion problems are an inevitable part of moving to Indonesia. The ETAs have been succumbing one by one, some to just an afternoon of intestinal gurgling, some to several days of nausea and diarrhea. But I believe I have the dubious honor of being the first ETA to present with puking and a fever.

Flattened and miserable in my bed, I discovered just how great my new friends are. They brought me crackers, Sprite and flowers; they rubbed my back and wet a washcloth for my forehead; they sang my favorite song and told me funny stories about their days. Not to get too cheesy, but if we can all give each other as much support and love over the next eight months as I felt that day, Indonesia will present no challenge we can't face.

Oh, and my episode also gave Ibu Fifine an excuse for teaching me an incomparably cool Indonesian insult that made the whole thing worthwhile: Saya mau muntah lihat wajahmu. "When I see your face, I want to throw up."

Babies, Barack and Sepak Bola

Our last days in Jakarta were spent enjoying some global universals: soccer--or sepak bola--and Barack Obama. One of the ETAs, a perpetually energetic guy named Brian, found an indoor soccer arena near our hotel and organized a mini-soccer tournament for all 44 of us. The idea so thrilled AMINEF that they offered to pay for our one-hour session. We played six 10-minute games--and sweat more than I think anyone has since the Wicked Witch of the West melted into a puddle. It was a blast.

Sweaty victors after the games.

For your viewing pleasure: a 20-second clip from one of the soccer games in which I am--surprise!--smacked in the face with the ball.





Indonesia's most famous American expat, President Obama, lived in Jakarta from ages six to ten. On Friday, six of us set out--with an Obama-Biden yard sign from my collection of campaign gear in hand--to find the elementary school he attended. The taxi drivers weren't exactly sure where the school was, but when I pointed to it on a Lonely Planet map, they said, "Oh, Obama, Obama!" In front of the school, there's a bronze statue of 10 year-old Barry holding a butterfly that says "The future belongs to those who believe in the power of their dreams." (Kind of depressingly, the statue actually had to be moved to the school from a public park due to controversy.)

We left Jakarta on Friday afternoon, which I think most of us were happy about. The city was too chaotic and dirty to feel like home and our Fulbright sessions were mostly bureaucratic or logistical. Part two of our training--three weeks of training in how to speak Bahasa Indonesia and how to teach English--is taking place in Bandung, a Javanese city in the mountains that is much cooler than Jakarta, in both senses of the word. The ride to Bandung was breathtaking; congested city streets gave way to rice paddies and green hills.

We arrived at the Sheraton Hotel in Bandung to glasses of cold lemonade, moist towels for freshening up and what I have to assume was some kind of welcome dance performed by three Indonesian women. This hotel's luxuriousness is a little unsettling; along with balconies and king-size beds, we each get two free pieces of laundry done every day and our own personal French-press coffee makers. And of course there's a gym, an elaborate breakfast buffet, pools and a hot tub, and the Jakarta Post delivered to our rooms every morning.

The hotel courtyard.

Supposedly, all this pampering can be traced back to a State Department rule that forbids us from staying in cheap hotels. It wasn't what any of us were expecting and frankly, seems a little contrary to the entire Fulbright concept. But I just keep reminding myself that in a few weeks, I'll be alone in a one-bedroom apartment in a tiny rural town with only mice and mosquitoes for company, so I'll enjoy the luxury while I can.

And how did we cope with the excessive wealth on our first night in Bandung? About fifteen of us gathered in my room, in the gorgeous batik robes that the hotel provided, to indulge in the pure, unadorned awesomeness that is Babies.

Kelsey, Brandon and I jump for joy.

Coming soon: our weekend on a volcano and first lessons on Bahasa Indonesia and pedagogy.

Pollyphemus, Indo's Own Cyclops

Have you ever given yourself a paper cut in the eyeball? Have you ever given yourself a paper cut in the eyeball during a Fulbright administrative session led by a US Department of State official?

I have.

The official, who was sitting on a stage in front of all 44 ETAs, announced that one person hadn't turned in an important form yet and they needed it immediately. Everyone turned around in their seats, looking for the delinquent ETA, who I suddenly realized was me. Trying to play off my forgetfulness nonchalantly and with an elegant wit, I picked up my form and waved it above my head. Except I didn't raise my arm quite high enough. The next second, I was clutching my eye, laughing and crying, while the rest of the room stared at me in confusion.

Eight hours later, the eyesight in my right eye is still blurry. And I'm starting to wonder if my Fulbright health care covers corneal transplants.


My first two days as an ETA-in-training have been (impaired vision aside) fantastic--interesting, challenging and unexpectedly fun. The flights from the US had the energy and warmth of a family reunion; at each airport, a new group of 20-somethings carrying backpacks and Lonely Planet guides to Indonesia appeared, saying "Hey, I think we're with you!", until by our last flight, almost all 44 of us were together. Along with sharing our near complete ignorance about what we were getting ourselves into, we shared our back stories. For instance:


Nicole, who isn't fazed by non-Western toilets (i.e. holes in the ground) because she lived in Ecuador for a year...


Jack, who took a semester off from school to work for the Obama Campaign during                                                                       the primaries...       





Leif, whose parents named him
and his three siblings--Jason,
Noah and Ariel--after famous
sea-faring figures (can you identify
them?).



AMINEF (the American Indonesian Exchange Foundation) transported us from the Jakarta airport to our lovely 4-star hotel, where the first week of orientation is taking place. I have my own suite, with a bedroom, kitchen and balcony, and an overwhelming view of smog-smothered Jakarta.

The last two days have been filled with information sessions led by various officials in the American and Indonesian governments, as well as former ETAs and ELFs (English Language Fellows). Some of it is dull, some of it is morbidly funny (Paul from the American Consulate said, "Hopefully you won't require any of our mortuary services. But you should know that we do offer them."), most of it is fascinating. I learned how to protect my passport (Ziploc bag), how to deal with dengue fever (sweat it out), which Indonesian dictionary is best (John Echols'), who to report overnight visitors to (the neighborhood warden), when to expect four weeks of vacation from school (December), what "realia" in the classroom is (concrete everyday objects that help teach a lesson)...

And then there's been the more hands-on learning. Venturing into Jakarta to find a computer adapter or even just a cafe is an adventure. My mud-encrusted legs can attest to Jakarta's filthiness--as Lonely Planet says, it's a city that's difficult to like. I was expecting people on the streets to be pushy, but they're unaggressively friendly and seem to get a kick out of calling out "Selamat sore" (good afternoon) in response our hellos. The taxi driver with tiny soccer balls hanging from his rear-view mirror laughed when I started singing Wavin' Flag, and then taught me how to say "I like soccer" ("Saya suka sepakbola"). The people are not difficult to like.

Arriving at the train station on a bicycle-taxi in the rain.

Jakarta's historic district, which is pretty in a peeling, unaffected way.

ETAs Abbey and JT dash across a deathly busy Jakarta road.

More adventures to come soon...